Category Archives: Life

A wedding, in the square, in the village, in N. Cyprus.

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As I was showering, getting ready for our evening promenade into the village, my Husband seemed unusually restless and impatient.  I was taking my time, washing the grit and grime away from our hike up to Buffavento Castle earlier in the day.  Little did I know we had a function to ‘attend’.  Yes he had scoped out the village square earlier in the day, and he was well aware of the function about to take place that night.  He was keen for me, and Poppy and Hugh, to catch a glimpse of local life, and I was ushered out of the door under the pretense that he was tired and wanted to get home soon.

We meandered up the road to the village square to get the children their ice creams, with the plan to sit in the municipal play area and watch them use their last reserves of energy on the swings.

When we got to the square there was a fervor of activity.  A wedding was about to begin – it was just how it is in the movies!!  I couldn’t believe our luck!  I waited in two minds while the kids ate their ice creams – was I invading someones personal moment if I tried to steal a glimpse of the bride?  Or was it really just like the movies where every man, woman and child is welcome to attend?

Suddenly the decision was made for me – the noise of car horns blasting up the road got louder and louder, and as the cacophony turned towards us we were cornered by the screeching wheels of 20 or so cars pulling up.  Ever tried hand brake turns around a small village square?  It looked like some of these dudes did it every week in their pimped up 1988 3 series.

So we stayed – and many of you will be relieved to hear that we didn’t actually get too close – mainly as I didn’t have enough Turkish Lira to pin to the groom and his new bride – it was definitely a ‘pay to enter’ wedding.

I only took out my point and shoot camera regrettably – but some photos came out okay in the dark.

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I managed to surreptitiously grab some snaps of the local barber – a busy man at 8pm – I keep trying to persuade Hugh to get his locks chopped there but he’s not having any of it.

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Watching and waiting…

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On arrival the Bride wandered around in a circle several times – I later learned that it is traditional to walk around 3 times with the bridal party before the wedding:

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The wedding stage was decorated and covered in floral arrangements, and the guests lined up with their gifts of money ready to congratulate the bride and groom .

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The first dance – I couldn’t help but wonder who this lovely couple were, and what life will be like for them here over the course of their marriage.

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The whole village had turned up with gifts – it was going to be a while before the party started.  I think I may have just left a bowl out for gifts and cut right to the dancing if it was my wedding.

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So we left them in peace and wandered home listening to the music increase in tempo – my feet were itching to do a u-turn but I didn’t want to cross that line of hospitality so stayed put at the house enjoying a late night beer with my groom.

My wedding outfit consisted of Gap shorts (not online – size down though they are BIG – these are a US 4!), Gap t-shirt (just $5.99 right now – make sure you size down though) and Zara sandals (in the sale) – I wished I’d been told so I could have worn a frock:)

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And my outfit for our walk up to Buffavento – I swear they could see me in Turkey in this.  Buffavento has never seen anything quite like it:)  The t-shirt is Zara (old) and the shorts are J.Crew chino shorts in neon peach, worn with my Newtons. DSC_0302

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Abercrombie & Fitch and Marketing 101

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Dipping in and out of the social media channels today I’ve noticed a lot of irate posts and comments regarding a recent article in Business Insider about the comments made by the Abercrombie & Fitch CEO, Mike Jeffries.  Basically he has said that he only wants ‘cool, thin, beautiful people wearing Abercrombie’s clothes’.  Reading the comments stirred me – but not into resolute agreement with the dissenters I’m afraid.

Before I continue I will preface with saying I am not fatist, remember?  I’ve been there, and I know what it’s like not being able to buy the clothes I want.  Even if the sizes were available – at my largest I really should not even have been thinking about wearing some styles from stores like H&M and A&F.

So back to what Mr. Jeffries said.  Anyone who has studied Marketing 101 knows that every great (and not so great) brand has a target.  You sacrifice being everything to all people in order to become niche with a certain core target.  In theory all brands are exclusionary.  Cartier market to wealthy individuals, Jenny Craig market to those that want to lose weight, Walmart target to those that want to ‘Save money. Live better.’, and Lane Bryant market to plus size women.  Where are the complaints about these brands being exclusionary?  I bet if you saw some of the white boards in those offices with the brand’s target demos, psychos and guiding principles written out, you would shudder to see who it really is they want buying their product.

I disagree completely with The Daily Mail’s summary regarding the furore – “But it might be time to change this dated business model. Plus-size, generally referring to U.S. 14 and above, makes up 67per cent of America’s purchasing population.”  Let’s stop increasing this number and start addressing the problem by getting healthier America!  I’ve often aired my hope that Zara doesn’t start vanity sizing for the US.  Their sales are not as good here as in Europe due, it is said, to the larger average size of the American woman.  Put bluntly a lot of American women can’t fit into Zara’s Large (very few of their clothes go to an XL).  Keep the clothes as they are – those that are desperate to wear the clothes and can’t, can go for a run and stay away from the chocolate.

Now I do realize this isn’t just about being ‘large’.  It’s also the reference to needing to be a ‘cool kid’ to shop there – and I get that.  There are all sorts of pressures on children as it is – never mind them worrying about being cool enough or not to wear Abercrombie, but ‘kids that are cool’ versus ‘kids that are not’ is nothing new.  Yes I have watched The Breakfast Club way too many times.  As far as I am aware most high schoolers can’t afford to shop in A&F without their parents chipping in – so surely that is where a parent helps to guide them with their clothes choices?  If, as a parent, you oppose the brand’s targeting practices don’t shop there.

So in conclusion to my random thoughts on the subject – I actually applaud Mike Jeffries for being open about his target market – it really doesn’t take much to work it out.  I can’t see it damaging A&F, in fact for many it will become more desirable – and for those objectors there are many other places to shop.

 

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Some punk inspiration.

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I walked into the kitchen this morning to the sound of ‘You’re my favorite waste of time‘ – not sure if it was the Owen Paul version or the original version, but here’s the Owen Paul version from ’86, which I remember well.

After a bleary couple of seconds wondering why Nick Jr. wasn’t on the t.v. yet – I realized it was my lovely Husband’s way of reminding me that 22 years ago today, over a couple of Newkie Browns in The Central Bar, he announced he was ‘infatuated’ with me.  I remember the whole day so vividly – from bumping into him in the library, to the Moscow Mules, to the shock and delight of discovering he ‘was into me’ (I told the story here last year).  He was, and still is, the antithesis of every other guy I had dated – non-conformist, smart, sensitive and charming (not sure how many of my exes read this – they might not anymore!) – I had a pretty good feeling this one was a keeper.

As the summer of ’91 progressed, our relationship hit the fast track.  Within a couple of months we were planning our first vacation together.  He was studying for his PhD in Byzantine History so it seemed natural to head for Turkey – somewhere I had never been before – but I was excited to have my personal tour guide.  Our first overseas adventure was thrilling – back packing down from Istanbul, via various Roman ruins (and bars), to Side on The Mediterranean, where we drank Efes in the sun.  It was the trip that sealed the deal for me – he was the ‘one’ – oh and he was hot too – look at the hair and those soccer playing legs!:))

Dave Turkey

 

 

These next photos made me giggle.  They are some of the very few we have from the early 90s as most of our photos were stolen, along with other items, from the container when we moved here.  My love of harem trousers must have come from him – here we are at my Graduation Ball in 1992 – he was dressed in Turkish, tailor made, harem trousers with a tailcoat – and had more jewelry than me:)

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Love the photo bombers in the back:)

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So today, unintentionally, I realized I could be accused of channeling one of his favorite bands – The Clash.  Happy ‘when we started dating’ anniversary my lovely…

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red and tartan

Jacket – Zara // Trousers – Zara tartan trousers (old)  // Sneakers – Golden Goose // Polo shirt – Matalan

 

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A weekend tinged with sadness.

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We adopted Rosie, our Boxer, back in 2001, and we’re guessing she was about 2 years old then.  So we knew the chances of her seeing it into 2014 would be slim – we knew she was slowing down.  On Friday morning, given some symptoms and tests, the vet advised it was her time, so with heavy hearts we said farewell to her.  The end of an era.  Rosie was one of the few constants in our lives over the past 12 years, she was gentle and loyal and we loved her so much.  RIP Rosie xx

Rosie when we adopted here – she had no hair on her back bless her but it all grew back:

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Rosie with MM – living the dream with a t-top Camaro (2002):

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On one of our adventures in North Carolina:

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The children were sad but quite pragmatic so we aimed to keep the weekend as normal as possible.  Yesterday we headed out to the mall and then to their favorite BBQ joint for a treat.  We talked about angels, old dogs and puppies, and now they seem quite at peace with the outcome.  We still have Tennyson here, and Poppy has requested that when we get our next girl dog that she has a tail – so we’re moving on…

It was a gorgeous day so I decided to go full on with the spring attire:)

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Trousers – Zara // Jacket – Zara // T-shirt – Gap // Sneakers – Isabel Marant Bobbys

 

Last night was date night so we toasted Rosie before eating.

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Trousers – Zara // Jacket – Zara // T-Shirt – Express (old) // Shoes – DSW // Cuff – Tiffany (MM bought me this Xmas of 2001 and I’ve no idea why I wear it so rarely!)

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We are beautiful.

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My spin instructor had me tearing up this morning.  Not because of the pain she inflicts on us each week (lovely lady but turns psycho on a spin bike), but it was all down to her little motivational speech half way through the class.  My endorphins were flowing but she also touched a nerve.

She told us about the following Dove ‘Real Beauty’ campaign.  A forensic artist sketched a handful of women based on their descriptions of themselves, and then again based on the description of others.  The results are startling.  In each pair the sketches are completely different to each other. Those created when the women described themselves are far less flattering than those created with the help of others.

Why are we so hard on ourselves?  I know many people think bloggers like myself must be full of confidence and that we must be incredibly vain to post photos of ourselves all over the internet every day.  But you know what – sometimes the opposite is true.  We all have our own hang ups and stuff hidden under the hood/bonnet that we don’t always share with others.  Maybe if we listened to, and accepted, other people’s complements more often we may see ourselves in a truer light.  As Jennifer told us this morning we are all ‘beautiful, strong women’.  Remember that the next time you criticize yourself in front of the mirror.  We are beautiful no matter what we say.

Watching this video even brings me to tears – but I cry when I hear bagpipes and brass bands too:)

 

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Oil pulling.

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I am turning granola.  Well I’m at least becoming more ‘green’ friendly and more aware of pollutants entering the temple that is my body.  I suddenly realized this just the other day when Avril was telling me to stop using Bio Oil as it is a mineral oil full of rubbish stuff that will actually dry my skin out.  Rosehip Oil apparently is the way to go – so I have just ordered some from Amazon to give it a whirl as a night treatment.

The other ‘treatment’ I started doing regularly just a few weeks ago may make you feel queasy – but I assure you it is fabulous and you will notice a difference too.  Oral health is really important – not just to prevent tooth decay and bad breath – but gum disease has also been shown to raise the incidence of heart disease and premature birth/miscarriage.  I am REALLY OCD about my teeth, especially after orthodontic treatments as a child and adult.  I want to keep my teeth around forever thank you.  In the past I have used a mouth wash for whitening, freshening and rinsing after brushing.  Mouthwash can be really harsh and has brought tears to my eyes in the past – plus read the label – I dare you – so many chemicals!  Anyway I was reading about juicing (see I am turning granola…) and stumbled across an article about oil pulling.  Bear with me.  Using an organic oil – I prefer coconut oil – you just swill it in your mouth, like with mouthwash, only for a bit longer, about 15mins.  Coconut oil can be a bit intimidating as it is solid at room temperature – but trust me – take a tablespoon in your mouth and it will turn liquid at body temperature.  It tastes fabulous – just like coconut – no surprise there really.  Ok so what does swilling oil do?  Well to a scientist, ah hem, like myself, it makes perfect sense.  The oil ‘pulls’ toxins and bacteria from the teeth and gums.  Remember hydrophilic and hydrophobic at school?  Well all the rubbish stuff in your mouth is actually quite oil friendly (feel free to switch off here, but I used to use oil in my research to separate certain proteins – some liked oil and some didn’t).  So the theory is that oil pulling every morning or every other day will remove all the rubbish from your mouth.  Avoid swallowing it as it is now full of toxins, and spit it in the bin or down the loo as it will block your sink drains!  I swear it has been beneficial – and much more pleasant than mouth wash.  Others say it not only freshens breath, whitens teeth and helps oral hygiene but can also aid a more restful sleep and diminish arthritic pain – true detoxification.  Give it a go and let me know what you think.  It’s now part of my morning routine – and I actually ‘swill’ while showering every morning.

It’s Hugh’s birthday today so we’re both hanging out together.  It’s the last time I’ll be able to take him out of school on his birthday.  The new drum kit seems to have been a hit (groan – no pun intended) – at least with me and Poppy – one of us WILL tour with Jack White.

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I had to nip into Zara to take a couple of things back – poor Hugh got dragged along too but he gave me 10 mins to try a couple of t-shirts that didn’t come home with me.

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Boots – Rag & Bone charcoal suede Newburys // Trousers – Dorothy Perkins coated jeggings // Knitted tunic – H&M (old) // Coat – Boden Iona coat (only $97 in clearance!) // Scarf – Marks & Spencer bicycle scarf

 

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Larkin’ about.

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Slowly moving back to the land of the living today.  Which is good as it is Hugh’s 5th birthday tomorrow and he is VERY excited.  So excited that last night he was trying to convince me it was Wednesday today.  Given my jet lag I almost believed him.

Today I took my inspiration from a couple of my favorite US bloggers – Tiffany Wendel Personal Styling and Sheree from It’s Not That Deep.  Both are Moms, and REALLY cool Moms at that.  I love browsing their sites, and though I’m not sure I can get away with all their looks, they certainly provide great inspiration.  Both of them have worn a black fur gilet over a denim jacket recently:)  I’m also trying to wear all my warm, furry things before it warms up and they get packed away to the downstairs closet!

I started having some fun on our big rock in the garden – a rock I only venture near in the winter as I am sure it provides shelter for snakes in the summer!

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Fur gilet – Skaist-Taylor for NM and Target // Denim jacket – Gap (old)  // Red jeans – Zara (old) //  Top – The Limited collection, Marks & Spencer (old) // Sneakers – Converse

Complete change of subject now, but I was on my drive into work this morning listening to NPR as usual.  They reviewed a book, Wave, written by Sonali Deraniyagala.  She survived the horrific Tsunami on Boxing Day 2004, but lost all her family to it.  It was heart wrenching to listen to her story – but I really now want to read this book – here’s the NPR link.

 

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I’m here!

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Sorry for being AWOL for a couple of days.  I spent the weekend and President’s Day enjoying time with my family before jumping on a Transatlantic flight to Manchester on Monday evening.  After a pretty painless flight I’m safely ensconced at my Mum and Dad’s being fed endless supplies of bacon butties – fabulous!  It turns out my trip is perfect timing – not only do I get to enjoy time with my niece and nephews, tonight it is the Brit Awards, so I also get to catch up on some British pop culture.

I traveled over in what I consider to be the perfect travel attire – comfy, cotton trousers, sneakers and a cashmere jumper.  Easy for getting through security – no belts etc., and easy to relax and stay warm in on the flight.

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Trousers – James Perse fine cord surplus pant (similar here) // Sneakers – Converse // Jumper – Char jumper AllSaints (old – similar here)

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I arrived yesterday to two pairs of shoes and a leather jacket:)  All items that I’d asked my lovely Mum to order for me from stores over here.  More on the shoes later but suffice to say they are fabulous!  The jacket is the red leather jacket from Zara and using the current exchange rate, and what with sales tax in the US, it was quite a bit cheaper to buy it here.  It is stunning, beautifully made, fabulous quality and lovely soft leather – I was worried it might be a bit stiff.  The only thing I’d change is the size of the zipper pulls – not sure why Zara insist on using huge zips on all their jackets?

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So today I’m off for a brisk run over the moors to clear my jet lag and then off to Primark for an hour or so – all on my own:)  Before I report back here are some other highlights so far:)

A couple of cocktails on my own:)

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The perfect Boden travel tote.

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A mixed tape from MM for the journey:)

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My youngest nephew, Tom, wondering who on earth I am.

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A fun weekend!

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Wow, considering I packed so much in, I feel like it was actually a long, restful weekend.  Friday afternoon I headed to a friend’s house for a play date for the kids and a wine date for the Moms.  Lots of fun indeed.  It’s a wonderful feeling when the children are old enough to play amongst themselves and the Moms can catch up…we were supervising – promise – bundled up in our puffer coats watching them play in the yard!  I did feel a bit guilty as I made my friend aware of some websites that were new to her – I think she had ordered a shirt, shorts and pants within 10mins of clicking:)

Saturday night MM and I went out together.  It was lovely.  He is lovely.  I’ve been enjoying my recent ‘girls nights out’ but there really is nothing better than a night out with the Husband, enjoying some great food, wine and conversation.  As I’m off back to the UK in a couple of weeks we decided to plan a few ‘date nights’ before I abandon ship.  I over indulged with oysters, shrimp and grits and a fine Rioja – perfect:)

I did, however, get a couple of jibes about my attire.  MM has a very wry sense of humor:)  For those of you familiar with British culture you will be more than aware of Blackadder.  Anyway MM wanted to know where Lord Melchett was when he saw me – cheeky s*d:)

The dress is Converse for Target, the fabulous fur vest is Skaist Taylor for the Neiman Marcus/Target collaboration from Christmas (no longer available on the Target website), and the boots are the Rag & Bone Newburys.  Really a dreadful photo but I was in a hurry – the cab had arrived!

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Here’s a close up of the vest – the shoulders are fab-u-lous:

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Sunday was of course Superbowl and I am thrilled the Ravens won – I’m completely crushing on Ray Lewis – he is so psyched before a game – and I will miss his pre-game dances next season.  Beyoncé killed it with her half time performance – totally amazing – she certainly silenced her critics.   How awesome to see Destiny’s Child back together too!

As for the ads – hmm – hated the Audi Prom ad – I thought it was totally irresponsible:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANhmS6QLd5Q&csref=92225226266327849

Loved the Dodge Ram Farmer ad though I’ll never buy a Dodge Ram:

http://youtu.be/AMpZ0TGjbWE

I wanted to dislike the Budweiser ad as it was so sappy, but I saw it again this morning and it actually made me tear up – I think it has more to do with Stevie Nicks than the Clydesdale though.

http://youtu.be/eUXdV7ODJLY

The Doritos ads were hilarious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThJbPJHAD70

Which was your favorite ad?  Any that irked you or moved you?

 

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21 years later.

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My final repost for now – dedicated to MM – thanks for all your love and support xx

First published May 2nd 2012:

21 years ago today MM and I became an ‘item’.  I’d known him for a while beforehand but a romance with him, quite frankly, had never crossed my mind.  He is 5 years older than me and back then, at the tender age of 19, a 24 year old PhD student seemed well out of my dating league.  We met while we were both students at the University of St. Andrews.  He was studying for his PhD in Byzantine History and I was doing my undergraduate degree.  We both worked in The Central bar where I knew him as somewhat of a ladies man, schmoozing the female punters with his extensive vocabulary, sardonic sense of humor, and couldn’t care less attitude.  That was until May 2nd 1991.

I was in the university library studying for exams when I saw him sauntering down the corridor in his laissez-faire manner.  I kept my head down not wanting to have an awkward conversational encounter with him but in the corner of my eye I could see him approaching.  I made a couple of whispered, flippant remarks and he asked if I’d be in the bar later.  Well of course I would be – even when I wasn’t working pulling pints of 80 Shilling I was in there enjoying a Newcastle Brown – so I thought nothing of it.  Later that afternoon when my brain was overloaded with glycolysis and other fun stuff, I perched myself in the corner of the bar by the water tap – my usual spot.  MM wandered in not long after – he lived upstairs so was often popping in for his caffeine fix in between translating Ancient Greek texts.  He looked surprised to see me there so early and I was equally surprised that he sat down next to me with his Gualoises legers and ordered a drink.  There were plenty of his football buddies around so why would he choose to sit with me?  I was just someone he worked with?  Our mutual friend S. was working behind the bar and at this stage he offered me a large Moscow Mule – why not I thought – it was a thirsty Thursday after all.  Time passed, cigarettes were smoked, laughs were had, the bar filled up and S. kept the drinks flowing.  Now it is 21 years ago and the blue label makes it a little hazy, but for some reason we must have started flirting a little and before I knew it MM was standing on his bar stool telling me and every Yah in St. Andrews that he was ‘infatuated’ with me.  I was caught quite off guard.  Little did I know that he and S. had been together all afternoon plotting some kind of rendezvous with me.  It appears he had ‘fancied’ me for sometime – which completely blew me away as, as I mentioned earlier, my romantic radar (which was always operational) hadn’t even detected him as a potential suitor.  Well as the story goes we embarked on a very intense love affair walking the beaches of St. Andrews and then of course drinking in the many bars to keep warm.  The summer of 1991 led to a separation due to summer jobs and then I went off to Lisbon for 3 months to study.  In those 3 months, in the days before easy access to email, he wrote a long hand letter to me EVERY day.  I kept those letters for years but they were lost when some containers were stolen on the move to Atlanta.

Through all the ups and downs (mostly ups) of the past 21 years he is still my best friend, the love of my life and he can still irritate the hell out of me!:)

We truly are evidence that opposites attract and you could not pick two people more different to fall in love:

1. He is a Southerner from ‘posh’ Cheltenham and I am a Northerner from ‘not so posh’ Bury.

2. He had traveled extensively and lived abroad, I didn’t visit London until I was 22.

3. He is incredibly well read and still reads The Economist every week cover to cover, I grew up on Enid Blyton and enjoy my US Weekly every week.

4. He was a history student, I was a science student.

5. He is terrified of conforming, I am terrified of not conforming.

6. He’s very secretive, I have never kept a secret.

7. He saves all his money and then buys lavish gifts, I spend all my money on me.

8. He never raises his voice, I yell.

9. He doesn’t ever worry about not making an effort with people or people not liking him, I am a people pleaser.

10. He is Scorpio, I am Leo.

Over the years he has learned to conform a little and I have enjoyed not conforming a little more, so as in all good relationships we have met in the middle – if not a little closer to my side – I don’t like to compromise too much:)

My Man back in 1990 standing in Ajax football stadium with the University of St. Andrews football team.  From Left to Right: Martin (one of our Best Men), my Brother-in-law (our other Best Man), and MM in his usual get up back then of ripped Levi 501s, red Converse boots, bandana and oversize cardigan. 

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